Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?
Perhaps the accomplishment I am most proud of is my that of my musicianship. Music has always deeply affected me. My mother, to get me to stop crying as a baby (and I cried a lot), would play a tape with children's songs, and I would immediately calm down. Even when the same tape played over and over again, I wouldn't care. Music has never ceased to fascinate me--the way one song can bring together a multitude of people with different backgrounds and experiences; the way certain melodies and words can penetrate every barrier, to the very heart and soul of a person; the way some songs can make a person completely re-examine everything they believe about themselves up to that point. Music is a powerful instrument. It makes babies stop crying, it lulls even the most obstreperous to sleep, and it unites cultures from all over the world.
The sound of stringed instruments is unique. A coarse, metallic string is brushed against rough strands of horse hair. Such rough elements, when the pressure and friction are just right, produce one of the most beautiful sounds in the world. It is a sound of intense longing, one that literally screams out from the instrument, one that, if played with too much pressure, begins creaking and hissing in agony, and if played too softly, produces only whistle-like wisps of sound. This delicate balance, I believe, is reflective of human nature. With too much pressure, we croak and screech in pain; whereas, when we treat matters too lightly, the result is an empty, windy sound that is easily produced and soon forgotten. But when we understand ourselves rightly, we see an intense, impassioned longing; one that is infinitely beautiful, but infinitely mysterious.
My parents recognized my passion for music early on, and began paying for private violin lessons when I was six. I wasn't always thrilled at the prospect of playing the Violin. Practicing was always hard for me (as it is for everyone), and at times I felt ready to quit. I would have quit, in fact, if it weren't for my parents who refused to let me. Now that I'm older and have developed my skills, I'm extremely grateful for their persistence in the face of my stubbornness.
Playing the violin has given me an outlet of expression. I have learned to maintain a disciplined practice schedule, and have seen my growth over the years as I continue to study and practice. Learning this instrument has taught me to persevere when things get hard, even when I can't see the final outcome. It has made me appreciate music even more--the precision it takes to make even a single note to sound beautiful as well as the complex mechanics involved in playing any instrument well. Music has a way of connecting with me, and with all human beings. Having the ability to enhance this connection with my own playing is truly a wonderful privilege.
3 comments:
John Mark,
Your instincts seem to lead you away [the end of paragraph one and all of paragraph 2] from responding to the prompt with the expected egotistical screed. While I admire the instinct, I think you should stay focused on the more pedestrian elements of the question--offering a sustained and subtle answer that incidentally weaves in your more powerful understanding of music and human nature [as you do in the third and fourth paragraphs]. The essay instructions suggest "look[ing] critically at the information in your application: your grades, awards, activities and work experience, family and income." You might want to bring up some of your specific musical accomplishments or events at which you've been asked to play. The instructions suggest you "Anticipate questions an admissions evaluator will have after reading your application. The personal statement is your opportunity to answer those questions." How can you elaborate on some of the information related to musical accomplishment in your application? It is definitely difficult to talk about oneself in this way, but I think you can do it in a way that won't come off ham-handedly. I suggest you make some room in paragraph two for this. Good luck with it. I'd be more than happy to read future drafts. Let me know if you update it.
Thanks for waiting so patiently for the remarks. I didn't get a chance to read these until this afternoon.
Cheers,
Mr. Boyd
Forgot to mention that I really like the fourth sentence of the fourth paragraph!
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